When He Leaves You on Read
One of my favorite parts of being a counselor is being educated. Not in the sense of earning degrees and certifications from higher education facilities. Nope. Not that kind of educated. I’m talking about when a teenager schools me on the current lingo. It saddens me to say I have reached the age were I am no longer cool. “Cool” meaning, being in-the-know about current trends, lingos, and memes - ya know, hip stuff.
Recently, a lovely high school girl came into her counseling session lamenting over her current heart ache. “He left me on read,” she said with quivering lips and sadness in her eyes.
In my mind, her emotional expression and her words did not compute. My 42 year old ears clearly misheard her, and I responded “He left your text unread? Perhaps he was just busy.”
“No!” She exclaimed. “He left me on “Read”! He read the text, and then purposely didn’t answer me, but allowed me to see the little word “Read” so I would know he was deliberately ignoring me.”
I thought to myself, dear Lord is this really a thing? And then I made a mental note to make sure I changed my text setting so it never shows the word “Read” again!
That little word “Read” might as well said “Rejected” to this young, tenderhearted, teenage girl. I could feel within my chest, my own heart ache for her as I felt the weight of his silence and lack of response.
She went on to share her thoughts and say:
“He’s not going to answer me.”
“He doesn’t care about me.”
“His silence says it all.”
And with those words it made me think about a time in my own life when I thought those same things. In my situation I wasn’t a teenager and I wasn’t texting some boy, but instead I was a grown woman praying to her Father in heaven and only hearing crickets in response.
Day after day of reaching out to Him, and hearing and seeing no answer to my prayer, I started to feel like that teenage girl. Negative thoughts and lies started to penetrate my mind, along with reasons why they were actually true.
“He’s not going to answer me. I obviously haven’t been pleasing Him so why would He answer me.”
“He doesn’t care about me. I haven’t been good enough for Him to care and want to help me.”
“His silence says it all. He’s not going to answer me because I don’t deserve to be a priority to Him.”
I can’t imagine that there are too many Christians who haven’t, at some point, gone through a time when it felt like God was quiet and unresponsive to their needs and prayers. I’m sure some of these same thoughts I have had, have also leaked into their minds as well. Even the mighty man of faith, King David, cried out to God for an answer in Psalm 13,
“How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever?
How long will you hide your face from me?
How long must I wrestle with my thoughts
and day after day have sorrow in my heart?
How long will my enemy triumph over me?
Look on me and answer, Lord my God.
Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death,
and my enemy will say, “I have overcome him,”
and my foes will rejoice when I fall.
But I trust in your unfailing love;
my heart rejoices in your salvation.
I will sing the Lord’s praise,
for he has been good to me.”
King David understood what it was like to cry out to God and hear nothing in response, but instead of accepting the quietness as rejection, he pressed into the Lord. He continued to petition the Lord, proclaim the truth of the Lord’s unfailing love, and then sang praises to God about all the times He had been good to him.
Maybe you too have had moments were you have prayed to God and felt like you hit send only to see the little word “Read” pop up with no further response. I know all too well how hard it is to not allow the response and words of the enemy to fill the quiet void. But I also know that when you feel like God is leaving you on “Read”, it’s not the same as when some punk, teenage boy does.
I pray in those moments, you follow the footsteps King David walked before us, and petition, proclaim, and praise God in the quietness and waiting. I believe you too will find, that although God is not always as prompt as we like, He is always faithful, always loving, and always working behind the scenes, in between each prayer and text, to bring about the good He has for you.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Diane Swan is a Credentialed Assemblies of God Minister, Licensed Professional Counselor, Speaker, and Writer who is passionate about helping ladies live victorious lives in Christ. Diane experienced the radical, transforming power of Christ through salvation at the age of twenty-six, and has since spent every day telling others about the redeeming, restoring, and renewing goodness of God.